How to get your partner on board?

By now you have decided that unassisted birth is right for you. You also know that having an unassisted birth is legal as well as how to calculate your due date. Today we will start the conversation of getting our partners on board. This is going to seem like the most difficult task in the entire unassisted process and for some, it just might be.

These are all partners supporting their partner in labor. #unassistedbirth #freebirth #supportingpartners

Lucky Few

You may be one of the very lucky few that you just bring up the conversation and it is a done deal. You partner may know about the experiences others had endured including being forced into unnecessary procedures. Your partner may be one of those amazing ones that just love everything natural. If you are you just have found the perfect one. You are lucky!

"When I brought it up, he was down right away with no convincing necessary. However, this will be #6, we are both very confident in the birth process, and both have previous backgrounds in emergency medical training. If we're being honest, though... I think the major deciding factor for him was that the midwife we used before charges $3k and he'll be happy to not pay that" says Heather.

"No, he was scared. I mean complications can happen. (I personally didn't look up any to keep a sound mind, my DEM did discuss with me about 36 weeks.) After we had our son and it was going on, he said he kept his cool and did what he could because he knew I knew what to do. He said he was proud of me and would much rather do it at home the next time we decide on another baby", said Natarra

Showing the research

Some of us need to see research before they understand another option. I am not saying they are going to sit and read for any specific amount of time but if you present a great case you can make it happen.

As we all know that a partnership is about having conversations and making compromises. I am going to try my best to make this a post you can read to your partner. We hope to help get that discussion moving in your home. I will finally go live and discuss our birth experience and my husband will be joining as well. For the first time in nearly two years Julio will talk about his experience.

We wanted to make these 31 days filled with resources. For the next 28 days you will have more research in your inbox than anyone could ever expect. Join here.

Was your partner on board?

In our community group I posted this very same question. I wanted to know what others have experienced.

"No, but what helped was him learning the actual risks, taking a Lamaze birth class, and talking to me until he truly understood my intense distrust of places of assistance. Once he finally clicked that my intuition was our most powerful resource, he was on board. I think it also helped that I promised that if we sensed something was very wrong, I would transfer without a fight," said Natalie.

"My husband was hesitant and nervous at first, but he came to understand why I wanted it so much, and supported me in it. We had several conversations about how I would know if something was going wrong, and what I would do, or how I would prevent things that could be prevented. I found open, honest communication was the best way to get over fears. When the baby came, he was pretty calm for the birth," says Heather.

"My husband wasn't at first. He was worried about all the things that could go wrong. So I joined this group, did my own research, watch YouTube videos, and shared the information I found. And kept expressing how important it is to me and how much it means. We both agreed if it came to a point where we or he feels like something is wrong and out of our ability then we would go to a hospital," replied Angelica

What question do have about unassisted birth?

3 thoughts on “How to get your partner on board?”

  1. It’s always interesting to explore different perspectives on childbirth! I can imagine that my husband would not have been on board, but I do enjoy sharing research and data with him.

  2. This is such an interesting perspective! Even though this wasn’t the route for us, I love educating myself about other ways children are brought into the world and the strong mamas who deliver! Great read!

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