With any decision you make in life you have that one person that wants to be negative Nancy. When it comes to pregnancy and birth it is no different. If you tell someone you want a cesarean section you are wrong because it is dangerous and has risk. If you decide to have a hospital birth you are introducing your child to germs and are having procedures and test down your throat. Well, okay fine you decide to give birth with a midwife and are hold that is too dangerous and they aren't trained correctly. So you finally decide after so much research that you want an unassisted birth.
You look into every possible outcome but still feel you need to hide your birth plan. You do hours and days worth of research but just don't want to deal with the backlash and negative Nancy in your life. No one likes to deal with a negative Nancy.
Don't give them the time or day. These negative Nancy types spend so much time finding ways to bring us down and then we turn around and give them all this energy to prove them wrong. Just don't! You don't need to waste your time on them. Use this time to focus on the important things.
Don't give details. We all tend to know who is going to give us a headache about our personal decisions, don't share too much or anything at all. Sometimes you just need to tell them what they want to hear. Find a community or support group of those who really do have your back.
Give them information overload. If you are like me and love to take on a project then get ready for a war. Start to send them all the information you have. This may just be a waste of time but you will love to send them a daily reminder of how much of a bad ass you are.
The first time I mentioned having a home birth, it was my first pregnancy coming to term. I had every single negative Nancy come out to play. People I didn't even know wanted to give their opinions. One thing stuck with me "You'll never be able to manage the pain". I still hear it in my head but not in the bad way. I hear it and it reminds me how amazing I am.
I have birth professional and doctors you know those fancy ones everyone brings up and say you need to see. The same ones that you are reminded went to college and medical school for X amount of years. Yeah, those told me what I wanted was stupid and I would put my child at risk and possibly die. I was told that I was going to cave the moment my contractions kicked in.
I went on to birth a beautiful baby girl with NO pain medication at a birth center with a midwife. My daughter Faith weighed 8lbs 1oz and was the best f u to everyone who thought I wouldn't be able to do it. I am and always will be a bad ass! I have now birth 4 children with no pain medication including the one time I was given pitocin and lied to about.
The moral of the story
Birth your way. Forget about the negative crap because you don't need the stress. You are so amazing and can birth at home, unassisted, in dim lighting, relaxed and surrounded by as much or little support as you'd like. If you still feel like you need support go to our page and send me a message. I actually answer back.
What helped you?